Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.