ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
did i just pee glitter
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.