is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
