so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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