I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
