hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
