not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
whose ass print is on the piano?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
how does that bad decision feel?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
