Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Randomize
