well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Actions speak louder than pants.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
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