id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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