I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
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