a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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