why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
