I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
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The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
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Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.