rhymes with "ouble enetration"
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours