dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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