Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
