Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
ok first of all what the fuck
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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