with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
it hurts more in the daytime
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i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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