I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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