We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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