you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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