in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
