Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize