Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Randomize