I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize