So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
my being single is dangerous.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
