please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
