One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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