I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Randomize
