We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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