this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
