She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize