called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
