So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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