good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize