dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize