I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
