There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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