so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
