So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
