In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
