i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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