Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
