some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize
