people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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