Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Randomize
