There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize