I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
