I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Randomize
