On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
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