just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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